Autumn

Once,

I met a girl who

Reminded me of Autumn.

Every day with her

Was different.

Some days,

She was as calm

As the cool breeze,

That softly lifted

The hopes of the lost.

Other days,

She raged

More that the

Ocean against the rocks

At high tide.

Being with her,

Made me realize

The difference between

Sweltering, summer days

And

Cold, lonely nights.

Although,

Some saw her as,

Complicated and Indecisive;

She made the infinite thoughts

Flying through her mind,

The conflicting changes between

Her desires and needs,

The uncontrollable process

Of falling apart,

Seem like the

Most beautiful thing

In this universe.

One night,

I woke to the sounds

Of her screams,

Tears streaming down

Her face,

Resembling raindrops

Slowing falling down

A car window,

During a thunder storm.

“I want to kill myself,” she begged,

With an ache in her heart,

Stronger than any

Medication could ever control.

“They hate me,” she cried. “They all hate me”

I held her hands in mine

And said:

“When I was young,

I learnt to stand on my own,

As being dependent on people,

Often meant trusting them,

And trust

Often leads to disappointment.

I began to count on

The only thing

I’ve ever known;

The ocean.

Every single time,

I have fallen apart,

Her infinite beauty,

Has held me together.

Every single time,

I’ve needed a friend

She has never failed

To support me.

Every single time,

I have lost myself,

She guides my soul

Back to my body.

She is the only being

In my life,

That I can always trust.

As I know that,

Every wave she pushes towards me,

Will kiss the shoreline,

Reminding me of

The soft lips

Of my lover.

As I know that,

Low tide will come,

And she will reveal

All the beauties within

The wildlife around her.

As I know that,

She will try to

Explore the city

And escape her being,

Every night.

As I know that,

The sun will rise

Every morning

And

It will set at dusk.

As I know that,

The stars will shine above us,

Every evening,

Reminding me of the

Beautiful ones I’ve lost

And the idea

Of something more.

The ocean saved me,

When all I wanted

Was to be six feet under.

I trust her

With every fibre of my being

And know that

She will always be

My strength

My infinity

My hope.

You just need to

Find your ocean”

She looked up at me,

With the universe in her eyes

And I realized,

Just as Autumn

Is considered to be the

In between period of

Summer and Winter,

She was the transition

Between

Holding on

And letting go.